This post contains very personal and sensitive subject matter. If you are uncomfortable with this, feel free to skip over this post and come back for regular content very soon! Thank you for understanding.
Last fall, I wrote a very personal post about our heartbreaking struggle with secondary infertility and miscarriage. (You can read that post here.)
I was overwhelmed by the response to that post and the outpouring of support, but also the messages from so many women who were going through the same thing or had experienced it in the past. Women I had never met from all over the world were reading my story and emailing me with personal stories of their own. Heartbreaking stories that until that point they felt they had no one to share their story with. It touched my heart and brought me to tears. My goal in sharing that post was to make at least one person feel a little less alone, and ultimately you all made me feel less alone too. Sharing my story was therapeutic for me, and I hoped that other women would find it helpful, but I could have never predicted the impact it would have and what a blessing all of you have been to me. So many of you echoed similar sentiments of feeling alone and like you couldn’t talk about it, and I really wanted to open up the door and take that strange stigma away. I wanted people to feel like it’s ok to talk about it. It’s ok to feel like you don’t have to sweep it under the rug and pretend like it never happened.
Many of you have checked in on me since I wrote that post, and I feel like I owe you an update. Plus, I am hopeful that my experience since then will be helpful to someone and maybe even bring hope to some of you dealing with infertility and/or miscarriage.
After I wrote that post, my husband and I went together to see a reproductive endocrinologist (fertility specialist). My regular OB/GYN (who I am no longer seeing) really wasn’t listening to me, and although he had run many tests on me, when he couldn’t find an answer his automatic “fix it” solution was to put me on Clomid. (A fertility drug that makes you ovulate.) I knew that I didn’t need Clomid, and I felt like in my case this was just a “band-aid,” not really an answer to what was wrong with me. I really wanted to find the underlying problem if at all possible. I took Clomid for one month last fall and it didn’t really do anything for me since I was already ovulating on my own, so I quit and asked him to refer me to a specialist. Clearly he had given up on finding out what was really wrong with me.
Well, it took the specialist 2.2 seconds to answer 2 1/2 years worth of questions. We quickly found out that I have hypoglycemia. This is characterized by low blood sugar/irregular glucose levels, and there is a wide range of causes for it. I was very surprised by this since I eat healthy and had been taking very good care of myself, but sometimes your body just gets out of whack and makes excess insulin. I occasionally felt shaky and weak if I went too long without eating, but I honestly never thought much of it since it didn’t happen that frequently. The crazy thing is that this can also throw off hormones and contribute to PCOS (polycystic ovary syndrome), which is exactly what happened to me.
My doc’s solution was to put me on a daily medication to regulate my glucose levels which would in effect also regulate my hormones. She thought that with this medication, I should be able to get pregnant on my own without the assistance of Clomid or anything else. When I became pregnant, I would have to stop the medication as it is not safe for pregnancy, but the hope was that at that point my body would regulate itself on its own.
Well, to our surprise and amazement… a month later…. this happened:
We will (finally) be adding baby #3 to our family in November, and we are so thankful.
We are still pretty shocked (after 2 1/2 years of trying and coming very close to giving up on our efforts) but of course very excited. I’ve been extremely sick during the first trimester which is why you haven’t seen many projects from me and my posts have been sporadic for a while. Our boys are extremely excited to be big brothers, as they’ve been waiting a long time for this and begging for a baby for quite a while. I am so thankful to Dr. Kaplan at Georgia Reproductive Specialists here in Atlanta for finding out what was wrong with me, and if you are local and dealing with fertility issues, I highly recommend her.
Here is the cheesy bathroom selfie I posted on my personal Facebook page:
If there is a message I’d like to share with anyone struggling with infertility/miscarriage, it is to trust your instincts about your body. Don’t give up on trying to find answers. Maybe you need a specialist or at least a second opinion, but if you have doubts about what your doctor is telling you, then find another doctor. Intuition is a powerful thing. I knew all along that something was wrong, and when my doctor gave up on trying to find answers, I didn’t give up. I moved on to another doctor who was determined to investigate and get to the bottom of what was happening with me. And thank God I did that, because hypoglycemia can be life threatening. Be persistent and proactive. You are your best advocate.
I keep wondering why I’m not angry. We went through 2 1/2 years of heartbreak when in the end, it was a quick and easy “fix”. But you know what? I’m truly not angry. Maybe I should be. But I believe with my whole heart that there was a purpose for what we went through. Sometimes you have to put up with the rain to get to the rainbow… I know that. And I also know that not everyone gets the rainbow. Some people struggle for years and never get any answers and never get their baby. It’s not fair, and I don’t understand it. But like I said in my original post, I have faith that God sees the big picture and we just see a small part of it. There is purpose in everything, whether we understand it or not.
I’m thankful for this pregnancy, and thankful for your prayers. And please know that all of you who are still going through the rain, I’m praying for your rainbow.
The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. -Psalm 34:18 *Update: We were blessed to welcome our third son, sweet baby Jonah, on November 25, 2014. Thank you for all of your prayers and sweet words.*Connect with me here:
Congratulations!!!! So happy for you. 🙂
Thanks, Amanda!
Congrats lady! I am so happy for you and thrilled it was an easy fix. Can’t wait to see that bundle of joy all over your instagram feed! 🙂
Thanks so much Angie!
I am so glad to hear that you found a doctor who found your problem. And happy to hear you are well. This really is a lesson for everyone and thank you for sharing it with us. It is hard to be true to yourself and you have helped us to realize we need to listen to our bodies. Wishing you good health!
Thank you, Myrna! I appreciate that!
awww bless your heart, Erin – i did not know of your struggles. It is very sweet of you to share this because i am sure it will help someone! Hope you start feeling better soon!! Hope you enjoyed the thrifting bus tour last weekend! I sure did 🙂 Hang in there
Kelli
Thanks so much Kelli! I had a great time on the thrifting tour. I hope they’ll do another one!
When I read your announcement on Facebook I was so excited and happy for you guys–especially after knowing your fertility struggles. I’m so glad you got a second opinion!
When I read your announcement on Facebook I was so excited and happy for you guys–especially after knowing your fertility struggles. I’m so glad you got a second opinion!
Thank you Katie! 🙂
Congrats!! So exciting. God bless you for being so patient during the waiting. I pray your pregnancy goes well!
Thank you, Angela! This definitely taught me a big lesson in patience. I appreciate the prayers!
Yay! So happy for you and your family! Congratulations, Erin.
Thank you Gina!
Oh my goodness!!! Congrats!!! You’re so right, trust your gut and be persistent in finding your answer. I’m so happy for you and your family!
Thanks so much, Brittany!
Congratulations! I have had a few health issues that have taken awhile to figure out (one that I’m still dealing with after years). I don’t get angry either – in the end, doctors are just people. Sometimes they make mistakes, but a lot of times I think the human body is just complicated. My next step (personally) is to see an endocrinologist. I think you just have to be persistent like you were. I’m glad you got your answer and it’s worked out!
Thank you Amy! I hope you find answers and a solution to your health issues too. I know it can be very frustrating!
So excited for you Erin!!!! I too had PCOS and went through IVF. It is a struggle to keep going sometimes. Thank you for sharing! I know it helps others!
Thank you Sabrina! Sorry to hear that you have struggled too. I have friends who have gone through IVF and I know it is such an emotional roller coaster.
Congratulations Erin!! I am so happy for you and your family!
Thank you Julia! 🙂
Congratuations, Erin! Such happy news!! Thrilled for you, my dear. 🙂
xo Heidi
PS — was so sorry to miss out on Saturday and hope you all had a great time.
Thanks so much Heidi! 🙂 We did have a good time on Saturday. Hope to see you soon!
Congratulations. Prayers for a safe and healthy pregnancy!
Thank you Brie! I appreciate that. 🙂
Congratulations! such wonderful news!
Thanks Gretchen!
Yay! I have been where you were and my heart goes out for you. I’m so happy for you and your family and will keep you in my thoughts. Congratulations!
Thank you Jessica!
Love that baby bump! Congrats! I can’t wait to see all of the baby DIY projects!
Thanks Emily!
Oh I am SO HAPPY to read this post! Good for you for trusting yourself and finding someone who could give you the answers you needed!
Congratulations!
Thanks so much Kristi!
Congratulations!! Love that Bible verse at the end of the post too!
Thank you Valerie!
So glad that everything worked out for you guys! I’m so thrilled!!! Can’t wait to see that baby bump of yours!
Thanks so much Dana! Hope to see you soon!
It can be so frustrating when doctors don’t listen to us! I’m so glad you switched, found a solution, and are now expecting a bundle of joy. Such happy news! Thanks for sharing a little of your story with us. 🙂
Thanks so much, Kara!
Erin, this is a beautiful post. Thank you for sharing. Psalms 34:18 is one of my favorite verses. I have repeated it to myself a lot. I am so happy for you and your family. I know one day Allan and I will have another Rainbow baby. Noah is a Rainbow baby, so I know and trust that God will bless us again. Congratulations!
Thanks so much, Laurie. You will have another baby. I think of you often and keep you in my prayers all the time. Praying it will happen for you soon!
I am so happy for you and your family and it is so very caring of you to share your story. It will hopefully help many others.
Blessings ~ mb
Thank you Mary Beth! I appreciate that.
I know this is an old blog post for you but a friend of mine sent me this. Thank you for writing it! I feel like you’ve written this story about a chapter in my own life. I have 2 daughters and my husband and I have been trying for 2.5 years for our 3rd child. We had our first miscarriage in August of 2014 (a year after we started trying ). Like you i knew something wasnt right.we got pregnant again in July of this year and i miscarried at 6 weeks along. Now here we are still trying. It’s been so so hard. Between the secondary infertility and pregnancy losses I’m feeling like I’m losing hope of ever having another baby. I feel the guilt too. Maybe I’m being selfish? Most people just tell me to stop trying so hard. I just wish i could get my husband to agree to see an RE. My OB has run basic testing and everything has come back fine. I’ve been on progesterone since 2014 and i even did 2 rounds of clomid. Anyway i just wanted to say thank you for sharing. Its given me hope!
I’m so sorry to hear that you are going through this. I know firsthand what an emotional roller coaster it is. You’re definitely not being selfish. We decided to see an RE at the very least to find out what the underlying cause of our issues were, and to find out if I had an undetected medical condition that may have served as an explanation. We never planned on doing fertility treatments (it just wasn’t for us, personally, since we already had two children). It turned out that I did in fact have a condition (hypoglycemia) and the first month I got on meds for it, I got pregnant. I would say it’s definitely worth further investigation/testing with an RE, especially if your insurance covers it. I hope you can get your husband on board, and either way I hope and pray you’ll get your baby soon!
Hello,
It’s funny we had our first son on December 25th 2014 and his name is Jona 🙂
since then, for 3 years now, we have been trying, with one miscarriage in between. I also feel like something is just not right. On the other side more and more I have this feeling that maybe we are meant to have only one. I just get this feeling that maybe that’s Gods plan for us. I don’t see the purpose of spending tons of money on a specialist. While I do feel like we are great parents and sometimes I do miss having a baby, I also am pretty content with our lifestyle right now, having a 4-year old that is pretty easy to take care of. I wish I would know the plan so I can set my emotions, if that makes any sense. ????
I’m so sorry that you are going through this, and yes that makes perfect sense. I know how frustrating it can be. Fortunately our insurance covered the specialist, or I don’t know if we would’ve been able to do it. Due to finances we definitely weren’t going to pursue IVF if it came down to that, so we just tried to trust that what was meant to be would be. Ultimately I just wanted to find out what was wrong with me, baby or not. I hope that you will find your answers soon and that you will end up with another baby if that’s what your heart feels is right. Hugs to you!
Hi, I am curious what medication your doctor prescribed for your hypoglycemia? I have the exact same issues and my doctor prescribed metformin, I wasn’t sure if that is what you took as well? I haven’t started the medication yet. I related so much to what you shared..I have 4 children but like you said, having had many many miscarriages isn’t easy no matter how many babies you have had before.
I’m sorry you are dealing with this! I honestly can’t remember but now that you mention Metformin that does ring a bell, so it was probably that. Good luck and hope it works for you!